The last time I saw my friend Wana, we were waving goodbye to each other in Washington DC.
We’d just finished speaking on a series of human rights panels in Nashville and New York, and we’d made the promises single-serving friends often do.
“I’ll see you in Windhoek,” she said. “I can’t wait for Lagos!” I replied, meaning it, yet oblivious to the twists, turns and viral pandemics life sometimes serves for breakfast.
Eleven years later, Wana is on her way. And, in light of recent headlines proclaiming Windhoek is profoundly and utterly boring, that kinda feels like a threat.
Wana has been warned. Windhoek is no Lagos, but it certainly has its charms. Even more so for people who have travelled the world and may be looking for something oddly indefinable.
Windhoek is weird.
I’ll even admit that the photos tourists take of the empty city centre on Saturday or Sunday afternoons have a certain post-rapture mystique.
But one of my favourite scenes from ‘Vanilla Sky’ (2001) features Tom Cruise running through a deserted Times Square, so I can dig it.
If I were a tourist encountering such eerie nothingness, I’d probably set up my tripod, jokingly pretend I was the last person on earth, and maybe go viral for my trouble.
The way I see it, boredom is optional. And if you’re landing in a place you’ve never been and can’t find anything to do, perhaps you’re part of the problem. That’s not to say Windhoek’s relevant tourism industry stakeholders shouldn’t improve their efforts to promote the city’s offerings. But it is to say Google is your friend.
Ten years ago, I wrote a travel feature titled ‘25 Must-Have Experiences in Windhoek, Namibia’ for Matador Network, and people can still read it and have many of those experiences today. Granted, Parliament Gardens is off limits, evidenced by the barricades ahead of annoyed tourists peering longingly at the lawn.
And yes, the Warehouse Theatre is no longer the obvious place to catch a show. But platforms like WhatsOn Namibia, NamEvents, and this very newspaper are pretty good about letting people know what’s up in terms of live music, nightlife and events.
As I write this and think of all things to do in my cute little city, I’m starting to feel less stressed about Wana’s arrival.
For vibes and views on Friday, I’ll take Wana to Stratos at Avani to watch the sunset. From the 15th floor, Windhoek stretches out in every direction, uninterrupted by a glass balcony that wraps around a terrace that welcomes locals and tourists alike.
On Saturday, the city centre is only good until about 13h00 when the stores and the coffee shops on Independence Avenue are open. If you walk further down Independence and take a left at the clock tower, you can see the Gibeon meteorites seemingly guarding a vibrant market in Post Street Mall. Here, Wana and I can shop for hats, sunglasses, sleep bonnets, jewellery, socks, cellphone covers, Namibian music, braiding hair, airtime and all sorts.
Alternatively, we can indulge our inner nature girlies and spend the morning walking at Avis Dam, dodging dog poop and being all kumbaya.
If we’re feeling arty, downtown galleries like The Project Room and the National Art Gallery of Namibia are open until 13h00 and 14h00, respectively, and are within walking distance from each other.
For lunch, perhaps we’ll head to Single Quarters for the local delicacy that is kapana, or maybe we’ll grab sushi at Daisho, Tide 6 or SeaSource.
If we choose the latter, Photizo Patisserie is right next door and it’s a treat of freshly made confections and friendly service.
Though an afternoon spent at the Independence Memorial Museum or the TransNamib Museum would be good, they aren’t open on weekends or sometimes at all. The last time I took a visiting friend to the railroad museum, we were turned away with a baffling and conversation-cutting “the guy is at the farm”.
Like I said, tourism industry stakeholders can do better. Especially when packaging Namibian history, culture and industry for tourists and locals.
That said, on Sunday, Wana and I will certainly do The Village Sunday Market. Think live music from national treasures such as Lize Ehlers and The Ells, Namibian gin cocktails from a distillery at Swakopmund, local vendors selling fresh produce, clothing, jewellery and art, the Pornstar Martini of your life from Zest, as well as an array of cuisine from delicious local food brands and from Indonesia and Iran.
Windhoek, boring? It depends on who you ask.
But perhaps Windhoek can be a little obscure.
We can certainly do more about our allure.
Meanwhile, Wana is coming.
And my not-so-secret dream of moonlighting as a Windhoek city tour guide is about to come true.
