When Pride is in the Way

They say pride will always be the biggest distance between two people and I cannot help but agree. That feeling of always having the upper hand over someone (and this is in terms of a relationship) seems to be… pleasurable to those with too much pride.

They never consider other people’s feelings – they always put themselves first. And sometimes this works, but other times, you just end up drifting away from the person you love the most, even though it wasn’t your intention.

Because of this unwanted arrogance, I’ve seen people out there who lost out on love.

Whether it was failing to admit they were wrong or apologising, they didn’t make an effort. They didn’t do enough. This is why I want to show you what you’re really doing when you are full of pride.

When pride is in the way, you push away the ones you love to the edges of the earth, even though you want them near. But you never show it. Your ego bloats into a thick bubble filled with images and thoughts yourself such as what you want, what you need and what you should have. Probably what you will have too.

But the bigger your bubble grows, the more the person you promised to cherish forever, your so-called love, gets pushed out and eventually walks right out of your life. When you try to reach for their hand, they won’t take yours because you only thought of yourself.

When pride is in the way, you tend to build a wall around you. But it’s not just any wall. It’s an impenetrable wall that won’t allow you to receive love from others.

You prevent them from entering your heart for many reasons, dark ones, in fact.

Sometimes you’d let someone in, but not entirely. You’d only share a piece of yourself and that’s all they’re going to get. Anything more would be a violation of your rule: ‘Never let anyone say that they know you better than you know yourself’. Instead, you prefer to have your heart layered with sticks, bricks, concrete and bones, until it completely turns to stone. But do you not realise that you are only hurting yourself?

When pride is in the way, you refuse to act first in a relationship.

They should be the one to approach you first. They should be the one to text or call you first. They should take the first step, because you want power in your hands. You want to decide whether to answer or reply. You want the power to choose where the relationship will go – or if there will be one.

And with this power comes control – something you constantly desire.

But you do not realise two can play that game.

When the tables turn, you’ll become the desperate one. You’ll become the worried one who texts first and creates non-existent trust issues. Think about it.

When pride is in the way, you do not share – hence, you do not care.

This arrogance you give off to everyone is only an act. Maybe it’s because you secretly seek everyone’s attention and applause, because you don’t want to be invisible. And maybe you seem desirable to everyone, but honestly, there’s a part of you that looks down on people – even your lover.

Serious commitment to a relationship? You would never. Giving love is easy. Taking love – not so much. And you will always be the one to remind someone that ‘he/she will never be as good as me’.

Too bad this inordinate self-esteem doesn’t make you look like the good guy.

Do you see yourself now? Do you see how pride can destroy you?

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