The Millennial’s Guide to Surviving Relationships

If you let my relationship status tell it, you’d think I know nothing about these things.

Perpetually single with nary a prospect on the horizon and very little interest in going out and changing that, you’d think that I give the worst advice about matters of the heart.

But the truth is, I’ve had my fair share of relationships. Some train-wrecks, one terrific and another pretty damn meh, I’ve learnt a few things from the men I’ve dated and the men I haven’t, and even more from the time I’ve spent on my own.

There’s no way to throw your heart into the dating ring without it getting a little beat up over the years, and I can’t promise you constant smooth sailing, but here are five pieces of dating advice that will help you along the way.

Instead of moving from one relationship to the next without a moment to take a breath and gather your thoughts, spend some time alone. Get to know who you are when no one’s watching and when you’re not hopelessly in love.

Be honest with yourself and figure out whether you want a relationship, a fling or to be the next ambassador for Hoe Is Life. All’s fair in love and lust and there’s no shame in whatever game you choose, but choose you must, and honest you need to be. Always.

Regardless of what you want from whomever you’re interested in, say it with your chest. Be honest, be upfront and don’t be sorry for wanting what you want. Whether they will meet you halfway always remains to be seen but never shrink yourself or your desires to make someone else more comfortable.

Often people will tell you what you want to hear just because you want to hear it. Don’t ignore that gut feeling that says they’re just not that into you. It’ll hurt but it’ll help you along your way to eventually finding someone who is.

The internet is a vast place with a lot of good – and absolutely terrible – advice, and there are many articles on how to get or keep a partner. My advice? Be the kind of person you’d want to date.

If you want someone who is kind, caring and romantic, work on yourself to become what you’re looking for and life will mirror your goodness back at you.

It’s not an exact science because men are trash and humans sometimes suck, but if you focus on being good and keep it real with yourself and others, life will very often deliver all that real good to your doorstep.

Not all the time and sometimes it takes some trial and error, but when it’s good, it’ll be real damn good. And even when it’s not, you will be.

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