If Body Parts Were Detachable

I have become so forgetful and absent-minded that if body parts were detachable, I would have been a walking torso by now.

I know you are exactly like me. Do you remember looking for your car keys, fiddling and tossing through everything in the house with the same hand holding the keys? We need help, sowaar!

Ewah, you heard it right. Please don’t tell me you don’t also forget things and blame everybody for it just to end up apologising because it was right there.

Imagine strolling into the boardroom for a meeting, all ready to impress your colleagues with a brilliant presentation. You confidently take your place at the head of the table, and start frantically searching for your prepared slides. Little do you realise that you’re holding the entire document snugly under your armpit, tossing papers around like a mad person.

Then you end up explaining that it is not babalas because you don’t drink alcohol and the bloodshot eyes are due to hay fever. Tell me that is not you!

Imagine you’re at a friend’s house (a friend with benefits), enjoying a lovely evening, and in a fit of absent-mindedness you decide to leave. But wait! As you step into the shower at home, you’re struck by the realisation that you’ve left something rather crucial at your ‘friend’’s place – your private parts.

Maybe this explains why some of you always go back to the scene of the crime. Naughty, naughty, naughty you!

You see, the way it is going now, my fear is that it’s not just the private bits that could go missing if this was the case.

Just think about it for a moment. How many times have you found yourself wandering through life, absent-mindedly leaving things behind, like that time you left your car at the office, took a taxi home, and only realised your four-wheeled companion was lonely in the parking lot hours later?

Was that because it was new and you still had to get used to owning one or is it that your mind was gone so far away that you were on auto pilot and took a taxi?

I am just saying that you and I, we need to figure out what is really going on before we start losing more than we can afford.

Of mati?

If our bodies were like Lego sets, some of us would resemble that old Volkswagen in the spares centre scrapyard, missing everything except the left light assembly. You know, the one that’s been sitting there for ages, waiting for someone to come along and wonder, “Where did all the other parts go?”

It’s the same feeling you get when you’re looking for your car keys for so long that you start cancelling plans with friends, only to find the keys lounging comfortably in plain sight, mocking you.

If body parts were detachable, forgetfulness would be an art form of comedy. We would misplace our noses, forget where we put our ears, or absent-mindedly leave a trail of fingers behind us like breadcrumbs. It would be a world of eternal hide-and-seek.

Think about it, aren’t you the one who got out of the car to look for your driving licence, patting yourself down like a mad man while the licence is right there on the sun visor where it has always been? What happened then, were you intimidated by the police officer, were you tired, or drunk?

It happens to the best of us, so please relax.

Now, before you start panicking about the silliness of this notion, let’s take a moment to appreciate the humorous side of life’s little forgetful situations. After all, laughter is the best medicine, even if it comes from imagining a world where people occasionally stroll out of their lover’s house without certain body parts.

In conclusion, my fellow humans with detachable bits, let’s cherish the few items we can still locate for now. So, the next time you find yourself searching for something you’ve misplaced, just remember, you are not alone.

Cheers!