New Year, Same Me

Most of us carry this quiet idea of “new year, new me”. Even if we don’t say it out loud, it sits somewhere in the back of our minds. And yes, it’s perfectly okay to have goals for the new year. Even though it’s a new beginning, there are some things that never change.

There is a book by my favourite author, Morgan Housel, titled ‘Same As Ever’. One of the points he writes about is that while some things in life change, many things remain constant.

They are the same as they have always been, the same as they are now, and the same as they will be. These constants shape our lives, unchanging and inevitable. Tragically, suicide is one of them. It is a harsh reality that someone will take their life, and this truth persists, regardless of time or place.

Suicide among men is a global pandemic. I recently listened to a TEDx talk that highlighted a shocking reality. In the United Kingdom alone, around 12 men take their lives every single day. That’s one man every two hours.

Those numbers may feel far, but the reality is painfully close to home. 2026 has started badly. Week after week, our newspapers report suicide cases involving men from different age groups.

It’s gruesome and heartbreaking to read about these stories on a weekly basis. And once it starts, it doesn’t stop. It continues and all we hear and read is another man has taken his life, leaving behind a note, or not at all, and leaving families with a lot of questions.

This leads to a hard but necessary question. What can be so bad that ending your life feels like the only option? This question is for us as men to reflect on. Is there no other solution?

I know it’s easy for me to write about this because I may not be in that situation and I am not the one experiencing that pain. But I truly believe this: there is a solution to everything and ending your life is not one of them.

The harsh reality is that suicide cannot be undone. Once it’s done, it’s done. That’s a fact. But if you owe someone money, if your girlfriend cheated or is cheating, if you feel betrayed or humiliated, those things, as painful as they are, can be survived.

You can walk away. You can start again. There is no amount of money, no relationship, no pride wounded enough to justify taking your life. There are programmes to help men. There are people who care. There are people willing to listen to you, I mean really listen. And in most cases, it doesn’t need to be a healthcare worker. It can be a friend, a partner, a colleague, or someone very close to you.

What matters most is this. The moment you feel stuck, overwhelmed, mentally or spiritually broken you must acknowledge that something is wrong. That acknowledgement is the first step. Once you admit there is a problem, seeking help becomes possible.

If you don’t, you remain trapped in silence. We really need to speak up, gents. I have written about this so many times. Talking may feel uncomfortable, but it can save your life. Find one trusted person and open up. And I will say it again: speaking can save your life. Suicide is preventable, but we cannot do this alone as men. We need help, and we need women to walk this journey with us.

Dear sisters, mothers, female colleagues and friends, please check in on the men in your lives. Talk to your fathers, brothers, husbands, boyfriends and friends. Ask them how they are really doing.

The reality is men issues don’t matter until a women talks about them. There is a famous quote by Chris Rock, “only women, children and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provides something”.

Let that sink in.

– Meneer_SK is a passionate voice for men, advocating on issues that matter to men. Follow him on Instagram: @Meneer_SK

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