Irresistible

The Urban Dictionary describes a ‘glow up’ as ‘an incredible transformation’, kind of like how an ugly duckling turns into a swan. Or, well, when you suddenly have a lot of money in your bank account and you can afford to have facials, buy the kind of clothes you know you deserve, and welcome the glow that is enhanced with the wonderful African sun.

There’s something about this transformation that gives you power, I tell you. It’s almost like you’re holding the world in your hands. You can feel it when you’re walking along the road and heads turn. It happens when you’re in the mall, in all your glory and filled with confidence, and the hallway is somehow your runway. Suddenly the whole world doesn’t matter – it’s just you.

The beautiful thing about a glow up is that it’s not just about physical appearance – it’s truly a life-changing moment when you’re incredibly in love with yourself and you don’t need anyone else’s approval.

Once you realise this and you start loving your body like never before, it’s suddenly like everything else falls into place.

The texts start coming through: “You look amazing!” and people can’t stop staring. They follow your life wherever you’re willing to put it: On Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, Telegram, whatever platform, really.

And then the likes come pouring in. Sometimes it gets to you, because everyone is so enveloped in your world, and you take advantage of that by becoming some kind of social media star whom everyone loves to talk about. It’s hard not to get used to the attention, really.

But just as you’re enjoying your sudden transformation, which may or may not have required a certain amount of money, the attention you’re receiving fades away. And you realise you’re looking for one person’s opinion only, the rest don’t matter as much any more.

You start looking for that person everywhere – at home, over your shoulder, in the shop, sometimes as you’re scrolling the internet and more thoughts hit you… And you start to wonder if they saw you, would they feel anything? Would they react the same way other people are reacting? Or wouldn’t they care at all?

Should you post a picture on social media where you know they can see you? I know you want to. Just so that they can give you a comment like ‘wow, you’re so beautiful’. Or even a like. You’ll even accept a ‘k’ if that’s what it comes to.

But yeah, that’s the thing about love, hey. It doesn’t play games. Reminds me of a quote by the late and great Bruce Lee: “Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable”.

But popularity… that’s just something you’d probably use to mask your real pain. And I’m talking about you if you know you look in the mirror and love your appearance, but sometimes picture someone else beside you, hyping you up before you go off somewhere… The only problem is that you don’t want the wrong person telling you this. You know, that one who you’ve somehow tolerated, but have no feelings for. But they’re all into you, for reasons you still can’t figure out. And thoughts plague you like ‘I kinda wish someone else was telling me this right now’.

It happens. I’ll go on a rant one day about the wrong one. Because I know that feeling all too well. Ja wat.

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