Faking Enthusiasm is Exhausting. Here’s How to Break the Cycle

When your emotional energy is running low, it’s easy to fake your way through the day.

But leaders who consistently ‘surface act’ by suppressing their true feelings while putting on a front risk falling into a loop of exhaustion and disconnection.

Research shows that breaking this cycle doesn’t require grand gestures. It starts with these small, deliberate acts of recovery:
Take micro-breaks on non-stop days. You don’t need hours to recharge.

Five minutes can make a difference. Deep breathing, stretching, looking at nature, or chatting briefly with a colleague can restore energy, improve mood, and even boost performance.

These short resets help prevent the emotional depletion that leads to surface acting.

Manage emotions in the moment. When you can’t step away during a stressful moment, pause and take a slow breath to reset your mind and body. Notice what you’re feeling, then reframe the situation before you respond.

For example, that tough question from a team member might not be criticism, but a sign of engagement.

Even briefly acknowledging your own emotions (and sharing them with others when appropriate) can restore authenticity and connection.

When you let yourself be seen as human, you foster trust, lower stress, and strengthen bonds among your team.

–  Adopted from ‘How Surface Acting Drains Leaders, and How to Break the Cycle’ by Alicia Grandey.

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