What Are They Smoking?

I’M referring to the lawmakers in Parliament of course.

They had better be careful or else an overzealous and ambitious policeman might rush in there to arrest them all, even before the intended illegal substances law (whatever its name is) is passed. It is clear that they must be smoking something hallucinogenic up there, given the unique and complex logic (?) they have been applying in the past few years to law making.It seems to have really opened up their minds and freed them from the shackles of ordinary boring logic (BL).In a recent copy of The Namibian I read ‘9 years for child killer’.Well it’s 20 years minimum for livestock theft! In this information world though, you can steal a N$12 000 computer after breaking and entering, threaten the occupants of the house with a gun, maybe even rough them up a bit, or maybe even kill them, and you will get off more lightly than if you kill a fattened (or even skinny) calf! It all makes sense if you think hard about it.Cows are food, and currently it is against the law to eat people so people are not food, and are thus worth less than cows.It took me a while to work that one out, but eventually I managed.If one plots the magnitude of the crime (in ordinary boring logic terms of course) we see a negative correlation between the magnitude of the crime and the punishment.Millions of dollars = zero punishment; murder, abuse; rape = usually less than 10 years; livestock theft or smoking a joint = 20 years minimum.This is using the normal BL that most people reading this newspaper are cursed with.It all starts to make sense when you move onto a higher plane and start to use the logic of lawmakers that really clever people like them use.I have provided you with an example of cows (important) vs humans (less important) already, but I admit to still being a novice in the field of Lawmaker Logic (LL).Currently, I am grappling with the slightly more challenging question: how the abuse of an illegal substance (e.g.marijuana) is seen as a bigger crime than the abuse (and even killing) of children, not to mention rape and other less important minor crimes of violence.However, I am certain that I will have the answer to that one soon, just give me a while…oh yes, and whatever they are smoking up on the hill might help too! Then I’ll write again, unless I have been put to death for losing my parking ticket! Dave Joubert Via e-mailIt is clear that they must be smoking something hallucinogenic up there, given the unique and complex logic (?) they have been applying in the past few years to law making.It seems to have really opened up their minds and freed them from the shackles of ordinary boring logic (BL).In a recent copy of The Namibian I read ‘9 years for child killer’.Well it’s 20 years minimum for livestock theft! In this information world though, you can steal a N$12 000 computer after breaking and entering, threaten the occupants of the house with a gun, maybe even rough them up a bit, or maybe even kill them, and you will get off more lightly than if you kill a fattened (or even skinny) calf! It all makes sense if you think hard about it.Cows are food, and currently it is against the law to eat people so people are not food, and are thus worth less than cows.It took me a while to work that one out, but eventually I managed.If one plots the magnitude of the crime (in ordinary boring logic terms of course) we see a negative correlation between the magnitude of the crime and the punishment.Millions of dollars = zero punishment; murder, abuse; rape = usually less than 10 years; livestock theft or smoking a joint = 20 years minimum.This is using the normal BL that most people reading this newspaper are cursed with.It all starts to make sense when you move onto a higher plane and start to use the logic of lawmakers that really clever people like them use.I have provided you with an example of cows (important) vs humans (less important) already, but I admit to still being a novice in the field of Lawmaker Logic (LL).Currently, I am grappling with the slightly more challenging question: how the abuse of an illegal substance (e.g.marijuana) is seen as a bigger crime than the abuse (and even killing) of children, not to mention rape and other less important minor crimes of violence.However, I am certain that I will have the answer to that one soon, just give me a while…oh yes, and whatever they are smoking up on the hill might help too! Then I’ll write again, unless I have been put to death for losing my parking ticket! Dave Joubert Via e-mail